I woke up this morning, probably around 7 am. It's Saturday. I don't normally wake up that early, but with my boyfriend's work schedule, I had gotten used to getting up at 6 am or so. Sometimes I would go back to sleep, sometimes not. But now I wake up thinking about writing. I want to go to the computer to see what I can do today. I also have been starting my mornings with reading.
Reading has always felt like a real treat to me because, as a child, I could not read until my chores and homework were done. I was always trying to get in a moment to read. Many times I read while my chores waited (and my sisters got mad at me because they were already working). I felt guilty, but I did it anyway. As an adult, I feel guilty when I read because I learned as a child that it's a past time meant to be done when the work is finished. But for a writer, it's not a past time, it's part of your job.
I still find it euphoric to believe that I really can read and I must read every day. It's been a while since I've really gotten wrapped up in a book. Though I have begun reading again, I don't immerse myself in the stories yet the way I did as a child. It will come back though. I might just be afraid to get into a good thing then have to feel that wonderful, terrible feeling of suspense in between reading times or while the author is writing the next book. Perhaps it's because I made myself wait for years for something that never happened. (Maybe I will write a book about that someday.) Suspense turned from pleasure to agony. I will learn again that suspense is a fun thing. Suspense and curiosity drive life and make it exciting.
So here's what I'm reading this morning. I may read parts of each, or just one book. I don't know. And that's part of the fun. I'm still finding my groove with reading. I'm settling into my life-purpose and it feels so good, even the learning curve I'm on.
Reading has always felt like a real treat to me because, as a child, I could not read until my chores and homework were done. I was always trying to get in a moment to read. Many times I read while my chores waited (and my sisters got mad at me because they were already working). I felt guilty, but I did it anyway. As an adult, I feel guilty when I read because I learned as a child that it's a past time meant to be done when the work is finished. But for a writer, it's not a past time, it's part of your job.
I still find it euphoric to believe that I really can read and I must read every day. It's been a while since I've really gotten wrapped up in a book. Though I have begun reading again, I don't immerse myself in the stories yet the way I did as a child. It will come back though. I might just be afraid to get into a good thing then have to feel that wonderful, terrible feeling of suspense in between reading times or while the author is writing the next book. Perhaps it's because I made myself wait for years for something that never happened. (Maybe I will write a book about that someday.) Suspense turned from pleasure to agony. I will learn again that suspense is a fun thing. Suspense and curiosity drive life and make it exciting.
So here's what I'm reading this morning. I may read parts of each, or just one book. I don't know. And that's part of the fun. I'm still finding my groove with reading. I'm settling into my life-purpose and it feels so good, even the learning curve I'm on.
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