Hey, everyone. It's a new year and time to brush off those resolutions that have been gathering dust since last January.
This year I have made a commitment to quit making resolutions and start setting goals that work for me. I'll show you three things that worked for me in goal-setting. But, hey, these three things may not work the same way for you as they did for me. So I encourage you to figure out your own personalized list for the area in your life that you want to improve this year.
1. Find what works for me
This was an actual goal I set several months ago. I realized I was constantly looking at the examples of others, trying to copy them, then ending up disappointed when their methods didn't work for me. I started asking myself questions like If I could create my writing day in any way I wanted, how would I do it? My answer included things like 1) Have coffee as soon as I wake up. 2) Stay in my robe and PJ's until I actually felt like showering. 3) Put off all my errands till the end of the day so I could give the best part of my mind to my writing in the morning.
Immediately there were protests from the peanut gallery in my brain. "But what will people think of you?!" "You know only lazy people wear their robe and don't shower till after lunch." But it was like I had discovered a magical strength in my body. Was I going to let these critical voices keep me from pursuing my dream of a writing career? NO! So I kept my robe on! I drank coffee and gazed dreamily out the window when I got up in the morning! And no matter how much those pesky errands tried to pressure me into getting them done, I ignored them until I chose to tend to them.
Stand up for how you need to order your day or organize your space so that you can create. Find what works for you.
2. Write what works and doesn't work for me
Each day I wrote down ways I felt I was either successful or had failed in the goals I had set for that day and in how I managed my time. (I have the tendency to feel like a failure even when I achieve a difficult task. Not at all a helpful quality.) After writing out my list, I could see clear ways in which I had succeeded. In fact, the list of things I was happy with was longer than the list of my failures, so I declared that, overall, my day had been a success.
When I had a day where the list of failures was longer, I assured myself that was not a problem because I was in the process of learning...which leads me to my last point.
3. For the things that don't work, write a list of ideas on how to change these areas or goals so they will work for me
So every time I "failed" I wrote down what I could do next time that would work better for me. For example, I kept setting more goals per day than I had time to accomplish. So one change I made was to be more honest about how long each goal would take to complete. By making this change, I had a realistic list of goals that I could accomplish instead of overloading myself and setting myself up for failure. Even though, logically, I know not to set more goals than one can accomplish during a set time, but I wasn't realizing that was what was holding me back until I took the time to write down my successes and failures.
So this is why I changed how I set goals: I wasn't reaching my goals because something wasn't working for me. So I took the time to figure out what does work for me. I still write what is working and not working for me when I get stuck on a particular goal I can't seem to reach.
Now go out there and write your own ideas of what might work for you. Choose an area you want to improve, whether it's writing or something more personal like making more friends this year or that notorious "lose weight this year" resolution. But this year, you're actually gonna do it, 'cause you're going to figure out which methods work best for you so you can accomplish those meaningful goals.
Be sure to come back. We'll be talking about goals and goal setting all January long to keep you excited and inspired.
Leave a comment about the one goal you want to tackle this year--for good. You can do this! You're going to set your goals this year, and reach them!
Next week: "I Quit Making Resolutions and Started Making Life Changes"
This year I have made a commitment to quit making resolutions and start setting goals that work for me. I'll show you three things that worked for me in goal-setting. But, hey, these three things may not work the same way for you as they did for me. So I encourage you to figure out your own personalized list for the area in your life that you want to improve this year.
1. Find what works for me
This was an actual goal I set several months ago. I realized I was constantly looking at the examples of others, trying to copy them, then ending up disappointed when their methods didn't work for me. I started asking myself questions like If I could create my writing day in any way I wanted, how would I do it? My answer included things like 1) Have coffee as soon as I wake up. 2) Stay in my robe and PJ's until I actually felt like showering. 3) Put off all my errands till the end of the day so I could give the best part of my mind to my writing in the morning.
Immediately there were protests from the peanut gallery in my brain. "But what will people think of you?!" "You know only lazy people wear their robe and don't shower till after lunch." But it was like I had discovered a magical strength in my body. Was I going to let these critical voices keep me from pursuing my dream of a writing career? NO! So I kept my robe on! I drank coffee and gazed dreamily out the window when I got up in the morning! And no matter how much those pesky errands tried to pressure me into getting them done, I ignored them until I chose to tend to them.
Stand up for how you need to order your day or organize your space so that you can create. Find what works for you.
2. Write what works and doesn't work for me
Each day I wrote down ways I felt I was either successful or had failed in the goals I had set for that day and in how I managed my time. (I have the tendency to feel like a failure even when I achieve a difficult task. Not at all a helpful quality.) After writing out my list, I could see clear ways in which I had succeeded. In fact, the list of things I was happy with was longer than the list of my failures, so I declared that, overall, my day had been a success.
When I had a day where the list of failures was longer, I assured myself that was not a problem because I was in the process of learning...which leads me to my last point.
3. For the things that don't work, write a list of ideas on how to change these areas or goals so they will work for me
So every time I "failed" I wrote down what I could do next time that would work better for me. For example, I kept setting more goals per day than I had time to accomplish. So one change I made was to be more honest about how long each goal would take to complete. By making this change, I had a realistic list of goals that I could accomplish instead of overloading myself and setting myself up for failure. Even though, logically, I know not to set more goals than one can accomplish during a set time, but I wasn't realizing that was what was holding me back until I took the time to write down my successes and failures.
So this is why I changed how I set goals: I wasn't reaching my goals because something wasn't working for me. So I took the time to figure out what does work for me. I still write what is working and not working for me when I get stuck on a particular goal I can't seem to reach.
Now go out there and write your own ideas of what might work for you. Choose an area you want to improve, whether it's writing or something more personal like making more friends this year or that notorious "lose weight this year" resolution. But this year, you're actually gonna do it, 'cause you're going to figure out which methods work best for you so you can accomplish those meaningful goals.
Be sure to come back. We'll be talking about goals and goal setting all January long to keep you excited and inspired.
Leave a comment about the one goal you want to tackle this year--for good. You can do this! You're going to set your goals this year, and reach them!
Next week: "I Quit Making Resolutions and Started Making Life Changes"
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